The other day we were talking about the cities that work travel has taken us. Portland came up…
Chris: Portland? I’ve been to Portland.
Me: How was it?
Chris: Well, fuzzy. I do remember taking some clients out to dinner and drinking a bit too much. After dinner I gave them the first cab and told them I’d catch the next one. After waiting for a few minutes, I decided to walk from the bar back to my hotel instead.
Me: I see.
Chris: But I was pretty intoxicated, it was like one in the morning, and I got really lost. I came to a cross street and was about to continue into what looked like a pretty sketchy neighborhood when a cop pulled up. He waves me over and says…
Chris as Cop: How you doin’ son?
Chris as Self: Good officer.
Chris to Me: Now keep in mind I’m quite drunk and suddenly very nervous.
Chris as Cop: Where you from?
Chris as Self: Kansas City.
Chris as Cop: You lost?
Chris as Self: Yes sir.
Chris as Cop: Well, I’m no taxi, so I’m not going to take you back to your hotel. I don’t even care which hotel you’re staying at. But I can tell you that you do not want to keep walking that way. (He points ominously.)
Chris to Me: So I thanked him, turned around, walked back to the bar and waited for the next taxi.
Me: Sounds… like an adventure.
Chris: Nah. You want an adventure? Have I ever told you about Birmingham?