© 2013 Aaron Atkinson

The 911 Pitch

My college buddy Jeff is a funny guy. He just moved back to Kansas City…

Jeff: I called to set up Internet in our house. I only wanted Internet. But of course they try to sell you the bundle…

Company: Sure we can do Internet. But you should consider our Triple Play bundle in which you also get telephone and a home phone line.

Jeff: No thanks. I only want Internet.

Company: But you could get all three for only $149 per month.

Jeff: Just the Internet, please.

Company: How about Internet and a home phone line?

Jeff: No.

Company: But if you call 9-1-1 from a cell phone, they won’t be able to automatically look up where you live from your home phone number.

Jeff: If I call 9-1-1, and I’m at home, I’ll tell just them where I live.

Company: In the event of an emergency, you may not be able to tell them where you live.

Jeff: I just want Internet. And your 9-1-1 sales pitch isn’t a good reason to add a home phone line.

Company: But it could help you or your family in case of an emergency, fire, break-in or accident.

Jeff: Just the Internet. All this talk of break-ins and accidents is starting to make me feel like you’re threatening me.

Company: You misunderstand. I’m only trying to help you, sir.

Jeff: Is this phone call being recorded for your company to review?

Company: Let’s go ahead and get you set up with your Internet.

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *


You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>